TIP 10: Learn the #1 reason why most people don’t master whatever they’re after faster.
If there were an opportunity to get to the cutting edge of your life faster would you go for it?
Appreciate the next story, because it will transform your path to success from a complicated winding road into a simple shortcut.
Have you heard of Toastmasters International, the organization that helps people improve their communication and leadership skills? I’d qualified for the Toastmasters district final, and if I won, I’d be competing against the world’s top 90 speakers. That meant I could be one step away from the chance to be crowned world champion of public speaking! One step away from being at the cutting edge of my speaking career.
Sitting on my couch preparing for the final, I smelled my wife’s cooking from the kitchen. It was supposed to be a family night.
“Are you going to skip another meal to work on your speech?”
“Honey, it’s only a week away. This is my quick ticket to success.”
My wife pointed to my son tugging at my leg.
“Why not take a break?”
“I can’t, I have so many unanswered questions. What parts of the speech should I keep and what should I cut, how do I keep my speech under the time limit…”
When I looked up she’d gone to the playroom with our little boy. She yelled back, “Honey, you really need to ASK someone who knows.”
Ever had your ego prevent you from asking some very important questions?
A few hours before the event, I ran into a Toastmasters veteran of 20 years. In his strong British accent, he said, “Oudi, you look like you haven’t slept.”
“It’s not just my sleep I’m missing, I miss connecting with my son. All I’ve been doing is working on this speech.”
“Still looking for answers this late in the game, are we? Come on, Oudi, you don’t want to be late.”
“Yeah, for my own funeral.”
I scanned the audience of nearly a thousand people. My heart seemed to be beating out of my chest.
“Knock ’em dead,” said my British friend.
How much time had I wasted reviewing unanswered questions in my head? My questions still didn’t have answers, so I wasn’t any closer to mastering public speaking.
My doubts were confirmed when I lost. All those months I’d neglected my family, too busy to play with my little boy, and still my chance of being at the cutting edge vanished.
I ran into my British friend after the competition. He said, “Oudi, at that level, it’s not what you do right but what you do wrong that counts. Didn’t your coach tell you that?”
“I didn’t want a coach. I was embarrassed to admit I needed one. I thought I should’ve been able to figure it out for myself.”
“Well, Oudi, I guess you’ve learned an important lesson: you always master it faster by asking questions.”
After I took some time to reconnect with my family, I remembered my friend’s phrase about “mastering it faster by asking questions.”
I wrote down my long list of questions and searched hundreds of possible speech coaches and training programs for the answers. After deciding on what I figured were the two best speaking coaches out there, I enrolled in their world class certification program. My new mentors were Craig Valentine, a former world champion of public speaking, and Dr. Mitch Meyerson, a psychiatrist and author who’d appeared on Oprah.
Not only did they answer my questions, they made me a far better speaker than any amateur competition could have.
My Toastmaster friend was absolutely right. You always master it faster by asking questions. Today, I’m a far better speaker but I’m a man who’s still afraid: not of asking questions, but not asking them. I’m only afraid of not asking the questions that will get me closer to the results that inspire me.
So what do you want to master faster? What questions are you holding onto? What do you risk by keeping those questions to yourself? You guessed it: you risk not getting the answers you need. You waste precious time reinventing the wheel and you risk putting your key relationships on hold.
If you keep questions to yourself, you risk mastering it slower.
Find a home for questions and you accomplish more, become more and get to the cutting edge faster.
Dr. John F. Demartini, a mentor and friend, says the quality of our life is based on the quality of our questions.
Why not take a moment to list a few of your highest priority questions related to helping you get your most inspired results? Next, identify who will most likely have your answers. Now give yourself no more than a week to find a home for your questions so you’ll inch closer to mastering whatever you’re after faster.
If you want to learn from those who helped me on the road to mastery join me Feb 21st at Emirates Palace for my workshop called ‘Get Empowered’.
Visit www.droudi.com for more